Trust

Build credibility and develop stronger relationships through authentic connection

Introduction

Trust is the cornerstone of effective leadership and the key to fostering collaboration across divides. In today's increasingly polarized world, leaders face the challenge of bridging gaps within their organizations and communities. Developing the skill of building trust empowers leaders to forge sustainable relationships even in polarized situations. 

When to use this practice

Utilize this practice when you need to:

  • Strengthen team cohesion and build partnerships across diverse groups;
  • Bridge divides across conflicts of interest and in polarized environments;
  • Navigate conflicts or disagreements;
  • Foster a culture of collaboration across organizational boundaries.

How to develop this practice

Trust is a two-way street, involving both being trustworthy and trusting others. Let's explore both dimensions.

Being Trusted: The Advisor Equation

David Maister's Trust Equation provides a framework for increasing your trustworthiness:

Trust = (Credibility + Reliability + Intimacy) / Self-Orientation

  • Credibility: Your expertise and honesty. Enhance it by knowing and loving your topics, continually learning and admitting when you don't know something, and refraining from bluffing or ‘winging it.’
  • Reliability: Your consistency in following through. Improve it by setting (sometimes even negotiating) realistic expectations and consistently meeting them.
  • Intimacy: Your ability to build genuine connections. Develop this by actively listening, keeping to yourself what has been told to you in confidence, and opening up and showing vulnerability when appropriate.
  • Self-Orientation: Your focus on personal gain. Self-orientation is below the divider line, so an increase on this dimension actually causes a decrease in trust. Reduce your self-orientation by prioritizing shared goals over personal interests, listening more than talking, and demonstrating genuine care for others.

To improve trustworthiness, people and companies have a tendency to overinvest in credibility. However, more knowledge and skill do very little to increase trustworthiness. Reliability is the most powerful lever. People trust people who do as they say and who consistently keep promises. Overpromising or setting unrealistic targets are pitfalls we must learn to avoid.

In a business context, building intimacy often presents the most overlooked opportunity for building trust. However, research shows that we trust people who score consistently and evenly across these four factors. Scoring high in one dimension (e.g. intimacy) does not compensate for scoring low in another (e.g. reliability). 

Trusting Others: The Bridge-Builder's Equation

When we need to bridge across divides or when our expectations are not met (e.g. we feel let down by someone who we depend on, or who we love), a different set of leadership qualities is needed to restore and rebuild trust.

Trust = (Acceptance + Compassion + Forgiveness) / Judgment

  • Acceptance: Our ability to be at peace with both favorable and unfavorable situations, acknowledging that things don’t always go as planned and that people have different perspectives and interests. Acceptance is not resignation; it is recognizing reality and deciding the best course of action (e.g. by reframing setbacks as learning opportunities).
  • Compassion: Our ability to empathize with others and genuinely wish them well. It is not limited to warm feelings towards individuals or a group you identify with. It is a more universal and active commitment to increase the wellbeing of the whole. Develop compassion by actively seeking to understand diverse viewpoints and recognizing our shared human experiences.
  • Forgiveness: Our ability to let go of feelings of resentment, anger, and the desire for ‘revenge’  without condoning harmful actions. It is about inner peace rather than absolving others of responsibility. Cultivate this by mindful non-response to our negative thoughts and emotions, resolving conflict, and restoring harmony instead. Focus on future improvements rather than past mistakes.
  • Judgment: Our tendency to label, criticize or condemn others (or ourselves). Reduce judgment by avoiding comparisons, practicing discernment (i.e. making distinctions from a place of emotional neutrality) and seeing our immediate negative emotional responses without identifying with them, knowing that they will pass.

As a leader, it is important to be trustworthy while continuing to trust others, even when faced with setbacks. Role modeling collaboration (reducing self-orientation) while embracing diversity (diminishing judgment) will help build a robust trust culture, which is essential for bridging divides in our polarized society.

Benefits of this practice

By consistently developing this practice, you can expect:

  • Stronger partnerships across diverse groups;
  • A more resilient and adaptive organization;
  • Increased team cohesion and collaboration;
  • Improved conflict resolution skills;
  • Enhanced innovation through open communication.

How to take this further

To enhance your trust-building capabilities:

  • Practice deep listening and empathy in daily interactions.
    🔗 Check out Deep Listening in the Elder craft.
  • Practice forgiveness around an event that still sticks with you and causes you to feel resentment.
  • Regularly seek feedback on your ability to trust and be trusted.
  • Study conflict resolution techniques to navigate challenging situations.
  • Cultivate a growth mindset that embraces learning from mistakes.
    🔗 Check out Growth Mindset in the Maker craft.

By mastering the art of trust-building, leaders can create bridges across the fault lines in their businesses and communities, paving the way for innovation and sustainable relationships.

Resources and references

  • Books:
    • The Trusted Advisor by David Maister
    • The Speed of Trust by Stephen M.R. Covey
    • The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni
  • Ancestral Knowledge: Buddhist teachings on the Noble Eightfold Path
This Leadership Practise is filed under:
Business

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